Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Friendship - Nature or Nuture?

Just recently through the amazing phenomon Facebook I got back in touch with friends from years ago - some as far back as elementary school and others from University making me realize just how global and mobile our world has become. But is social media changing the way we are, make and maintain friends?

Everyone has had the random friend invite from the guy or gal you just dont know (and not in that Friday Night - we kissed but I forgot sense no the real I just have no clue who you are sense). Now why would you do that? Surely the idea is to be in touch and part of the lives of people you are care about, are interested in and or want to stay in touch with. Maybe I am just getting old and to me some random wanting to be my 'friend' without knowing me seems a little well hmmmm what's the word - random. But is social media helping us maintain friendships?

I once read (please dont ask for the source) that we change our friends every 7 years like the closet clear out thing that I should consider doing but find really unsettling. Just recently I missed that top that I am sure I had prior to my move back to NL so was it really wise to throw it out??? So I cant do it. I cant unfriend friends. I cant even do the guy thing and stop calling. I truly believe in growing, watering and feeding friendships. Doesnt mean that I see my friends all the time but when you are the one to leave - i.e. move - you need to invest. So thank FB for saving me a few Euros on the phone bills. Because that to me is the sad thing - lives go on, and when you move you need to build a new life and so at times you end up missing and romanticising the old one. So when you are then the one wanting to stay in touch it is sometimes a little sad that you are the only having to call or email or text or in my case send smoke signals. But I get it which is why I adore technology for making it easier to reach people and let my darling friends know I miss them, care about them, think of them. So if you are reading this you have been told mwuahhh.

I dont understand people who just naturally let friendship grow and become whatever they like. Surely that isnt how you would treat your hair, nails, garden - insert any suitable comparison - so why friendship. It's not a given and like a relationship needs a bit of love and attention.

That said - let's be honest the best friendships are those that you can leave neglected for a long while and pick up where you left off. Now if only my hair would do that.

lots of love friends x



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